As I write this it’s late on Friday night. I’m tired and Seth is asleep. He is a great kid but this is one of those nights where he didn’t want to sleep and was just generally grumpy, therefore mum and dad are very much “on duty”.
I happened to be the one holding him when he finally gave up the teary battle and went to sleep. While I was holding him and swaying back and forth making sure he was definitely asleep, it struck me how I am with God sometimes.
Just like Seth, sometimes in my humanity I’m thrashing about, thinking I know what is best and what should be happening. But God knows I can’t do it all myself and that all I really need to do is cooperate and rest in Him.
Instead of yielding to that reality, both Seth and I fight for control when the reality is, if his earthly father or my Heavenly Father were to let go, we would both be helpless.
It wasn’t my fault that Seth wasn’t happy, in fact I was doing my best to give him the very thing that would make him feel better, rest… but he couldn’t see it, he just kept crying and fighting me.
If you haven’t guessed where I am going with this, let me put it more plainly…
I wrestle with God sometimes. I get grumpy with Him and want to live life on my own terms, but somehow I remain blind to my own total reliance on Him.
Like Seth finally giving up and resting in my arms, that is the only appropriate response to God.
Stop the fight.
Rest in His arms.
Let Him love you.